Most teachers ask me which is better - teaching in big classes with 4-6 subjects/day, or being in a self-contained class with 4 subjects and 8-10 kids to individualize instruction for?

I’ve seen both worlds. I‘ve noticed that being in any of these can result to total exhaustion which may make someone think of quitting every freakin’ day.

But both can also make one just physically exhausted but happy - like fulfilled happy.

Being a classroom teacher of young children for 7 years, I found out that feeling drained (in all aspects!) for a day is understandable.

However, feeling burnt out and dissatisfied for months or even years is a different story.

To continually enjoy my chosen path despite the many demands of my work, I’ve researched and experimented on a number of evidence-based teaching strategies.

This is one of the techniques I’ve been enjoying the most: creating positive relationships with children.

Here’s how according to most studies like this one:

• Greet or just simply smile at each one of them when they arrive in class,
• be a patient and interested audience when they tell random stories (no matter how long it is),
• give them specific praises,
• meet their emotional needs by talking to them when they look scared or sad,
• or send their parents positive notes about their children.

(I wrote more about these strategies on a separate post.)

These acts look simple. However, when these are done consistently, it becomes magical.

Whatever feeling or mood I’ve had, I’ve committed myself into doing this, and it has worked wonders for me and my kids.

I don’t have to raise my voice. I don’t have to wear that “teacher look”. I can smile all day and be my cheerful self! I do these and yet they follow whatever I tell them to all the time!

What’s more is that this has worked in both small and big classes. There were minimal (even close to none) incidents like kids kicking or hitting each other.

I think it’s because, establishing good relationships with each of them makes them feel seen, belonged, loved and cared for.

And when they feel that good, they soar.

They strive and persist when they see that someone is there to back them up when they make mistakes.

They learn better when they feel liked.

I noticed that most of the time, teachers easily get caught up with the content and delivery of the topics, plus the materials to be used on each lesson.

Solely focusing on the paperworks makes us miss out the most important role that we should have as a teacher - treating them as a whole person.

Sometimes, we still feel ineffective despite doing the best we can on keeping them in balance because of some children who have challenging behaviors.

They tend to need more of our time and energy. They are unaware on how their behaviors suck the life out of us.

Just like when a child chooses to be defiant in spite of the hard work we put on establishing a good relationship with him/her.

Like you’re discussing a topic in front of the class, when a kid just pretends to be a dog and goes around the room on all fours.

We’re just humans and it’s normal to feel so, so bad about their poor habits and choices.

To keep my cool and maintain my positive relationships with them, what I do is to focus on their positive side.

Doing this, I’ve observed that whatever misbehavior they do, it doesn’t make me build resentments nor self-frustrations.

Looking at their good side reminds me that they are good people who are just making mistakes at the moment, and that they need help.

Their misbehaviour also serves as a source of information.

It could mean they’re bored or they’re having a difficult time understanding the lesson, which we should immediately address.

Or maybe they’re just having a bad day, that’s why they look grumpy.

Using this perspective is a win-win thing — I feel less mad which definitely saves energy (and makes me happier), and helps me keep the positive relationship with the child which surely improves his/her behavior later on (which will make me happier as a teacher in the future).

Of course, this ain’t easy.

At first.

Until it becomes a habit.

Applying the mental model of “compound interest”, committing on doing the techniques every moment, and eventually making them as our habits, surely result to overwhelming rewards.

What I love about being a teacher is that it also helps me to get better at being human.

The strategies I mentioned here are also applicable on dealing with people in general.

Establishing positive relationships and focusing on everyone’s strengths have spurred me to accept people more (even their habits that I find annoying) and judge less.

I did it to myself and has improved the way I love myself too.

The internal struggle is always there, but I think that’s how growth happens.

Without struggle, there would be no learning or development.

I simply make an effort to keep my attention on the reward rather than the battle.

This is what’s gotten me high on teaching, learning, and living.

Oh, God is awesome He puts us to a place where we can love and serve Him better...